TORONTO -- The age-old bias that suggests 鈥渂oys don鈥檛 cry鈥� is unconsciously perpetuated by mothers more than fathers, according to new research from the University of Guelph.
The study, published in the , found that moms tend to favour girls expressing emotions of sadness and anger over boys. Fathers, on the other hand, lacked a bias towards emotions of anger and sadness in their children.
鈥淎ngry girls are still more pleasant than boys, as per this test,鈥� , study author and psychology professor at the University of Guelph, told CTVNews.ca by phone Tuesday.
鈥淭hat suggests it鈥檚 more acceptable for girls to be 鈥榚motional鈥� than boys.鈥�
Nearly 600 Canadian and American parents were shown images of children between the ages of eight and 12 conveying sadness, anger, or neutral expressions as part of the study. Participants were then told to sort each image into a 鈥減leasant鈥� or 鈥渦npleasant鈥� category.
鈥淚f you were quicker to report the crying boy as 鈥榰npleasant,鈥� the idea is you have an implicit bias towards boys showing that emotion,鈥� explained Thomassin.
However, mothers likely aren鈥檛 even aware they have these gender biases and may not necessarily enforce those biases in their parenting, the study author notes.
鈥淲hat we鈥檙e measuring is this self-conscious knowledge of our stereotypes within society. It doesn鈥檛 mean that you as an individuals have those personal values,鈥� Thomassin said.
鈥淭his isn鈥檛 meant to say that moms are ruining everything. It would be really interesting to see those biases, their beliefs, and how that reflects in their actual parenting styles.鈥�
In an ironic twist, researchers went into the study with their own gender biases, assuming that dads would be more biased towards boys showing emotions and encourage them to 鈥渢oughen up鈥� during moments of sadness.
To be sure of the results, Thomassin鈥檚 team ran the study with a different sample, but ended up with the same results.
Unconscious bias may still present parenting risk
In her previous research, Thomassin says parents often report that although they don鈥檛 believe to have these types of gender biases, they are aware that they exist in society.
鈥淧arents are then conflicted,鈥� she said. 鈥淒o they teach their sons that crying is OK, or do they tell them that they risk being bullied at school if they show emotion?鈥�
Caron Irwin, child development expert and , warns that labelling any sort of emotion based on gender can have a negative impact on child development.
鈥淲hether it鈥檚 鈥榖oys don鈥檛 cry,鈥� or saying something like 鈥榤y child is shy,鈥� when we label them we are prescribing them how they need to be,鈥� Irwin told CTVNews.ca by phone Tuesday.
Instead of labelling those emotions, Irwin suggests that parents qualify those feelings for their children so that they can use words to describe how they are feeling.
鈥淓ventually, instead of crying they will use words like 鈥業 feel mad because鈥�,鈥� she explained. 鈥淚t normalizes these feelings and behaviours.鈥�
Irwin also suggests that parents make their kids aware of all the different emotions people experience and how they can be communicated by different people, regardless of gender. A good way to do that, she says, is to read storybooks describing emotions.
鈥淚 also think parents should have a variety of different books showcasing a variety of genders engaging in a variety of different activities,鈥� she said.
鈥淭his also helps provide kids with a diverse perspective on gender roles and break down the stereotypical gender roles.鈥�
